one woman's journey to the cross

So last night, Phil and I were watching TV and decided to watch the Passion that we had recorded on Sunday.  Yes, I know it was on Sunday and it is a couple days later but the Badgers were on Sunday.  The reviews had been bad but I still wanted to watch, the idea had intriged  me, a modern day Christ with modern music, why not.  Well the reviews weren't wrong, it was a cheesy version that included a lighted cross slowly moving down through New Orleans with media commentary and all.  So why was I still watching?  I was enjoying the music so we kept watching and fast forwarding through the stuff that was over the top. The concept of putting a modern face and voice to this story pulls you in as it has for 2000 years.  At the point were Judas betrays Jesus my emotions were starting to roller coaster.  The song Demons by Imagine Dragons was the song of the scene, it the song Dora had used her piano piece last year.  It was powerful on many levels. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MvferqPi4xQ  As the story continued to the death of Jesus and the cross entering the stage area, I found myself crying.  The image of Trisha Yearwood, singing a song of pain over a dead child really hit me.  I have seen this image, I know Mother's whom have lost children.  This wasn't a story from 2000 years ago. this a story of today.  The resurrection was beautiful with a large gospel choir backing up Jesus on Unconditionally. It is a story of true love and sacrifice for others.   Cheesy and new but why did it make me toss and turn 2/3 of the night.

About 2.5 weeks ago while at work at Lakeside an athlete had asked me what my hardest moment in life had been.  I have struggled with this question since that time.  I have had many difficult situations in life at work and at home.   None of these situations fit as a hard time for me.  Holding the hand of a dying child, holding the hand of the mother of the dying child, not understanding the process of infertility, adopting a child from China.. all of these things are difficult but nothing I would call hard.  Then I realized why they weren't hard. I have had the love and support of God and his son to help me, they have provided family and friends to guide me through these times and a strong partner to stand with me in all of them.  I know it sounds corny but a cheesy Fox rendition of the Passion helped visualize what I was taking for granted. As I watched Judas betray and Peter deny, I saw myself.  Their struggles are my own.  As I begin to realize my hardest moments have not been times of struggle and hardship, they have been supported with love and kindness, The hardest times are the times I denied my love to others and walked away.   My times of self righteousness and self doubt, when I put myself before others.  When I didn't have the time to support another or celebrate a life.  Those are my regrets.  It is my humility that moves me this week, I have truly seen the reason for this week and that in my humanness and everyone's imperfections that is why it even exists.  I hope to use this knowledge in a way that is worthy.  I know some of my hardest times are still ahead of me, but with my faith I know the love with survive.

So whether you see Jesus as your saviour, a prophet, a spiritual leader or a guy with a bunch of groupies.  My prayer for you this week is for peace and kindness and some time to spread love to your world.

This is my Kingdom Come!! This is my Kingdom Come!!

Peace